The Priest, The Lawyer, And The Physicist

by Neil Zayn


               Over 200 years ago we had the great French revolution, and one day there were three gentlemen about to lose their heads to the gelatin. There was a priest, a lawyer, and a theoretical physicist about their heads cut off. So they put the priest's head on the chopping block and they ask him "do have any last words before we cut your priestly head off?" and the priest said yes. He said "God from above, He shall certainly set me free." While all eyes run the blade, they raised the blade. The blade came down and it stopped right before it hit the neck of the priest. Well the mob have never seen this before. They were shocked, they said "God has spoken! Let the priest go." And now its the lawyer's turn. They put the lawyer's head on the chopping block and they asked him, "do you have any last words before we cut your lawyerly head off?" and he said yes. He said "Maybe the spirit of justice and mercy shall set me free." Then they raised the blade. The blade came down and it stopped right before it hit the neck of the lawyer. This time the crowd went crazy, they said "Let there be a national holiday! Today justice and mercy has spoken." And now its the theoretical physicist's turn. They put the physicist's head on the chopping block and they asked him, "do you have any last words before we cut your head off?" and he said "yes, I got some last words. I don't know too much about God and I know even less about the law. But I do know one thing. If you look up you'll see that the rope is stuck on the pulley. If you remove the rope, the blade should come down real good." Well they did what the physicist told them, the rope came down, the blade came down and the poor physicist's head came down too. Moral of the story? Sometimes physicists should know when to keep their mouth shut.